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[Kizito]

I seek courage to confront these battles from all fronts
that, torment me til' im paralysed in fear of mental shortcomings
hope is forth coming but my heart is short sighted
i being the fourth sighted of a breed rare from the start
Marley, Luther, i, & the one to come.



From the North, i battle poverty and loss of little gained
born pauper, with no consoling words or encouragement
Once an enraged youth seeking change stumbled upon a Christ
then shed tears of repentance for sins that he didnt see
in hidden seas of conflict thats internal flowing deeper
because.. hidden well.. are the hidden wells of water that rids thirst..

out of within in abundance, humming to tunes at Sundance,
bubbling in dreams and one trance... will stump on you off of self and into a deeper self.
self is finding others...
his deepest fear being himself, when love presents herself.
i run parallel to the sun, to overtake me.
i know there is better with in, well, now i do
the innocence in me knows that the turbulence shall surely pass.
but the vivid reality of today, inslaves my hope
behind bars, like an alcoholic.
well, thats the spirit!!
to find self in hopelessness is but a start i finished long ago.
to find self (others) within... well thats a start..



& in the south, have we lost ourself since that day we lost our "self."
have we not found a significant other within our own self?
has destiny's jagged path become so crooked we cant tarry on
to our fixed destination to which a straight line is the shortest distance.
i've been seeking my eternal craziness to hear and understand.
Declaring to self "Thou Art.. and nobody else"
to prove thus i try harder and strive for excellence
and if i fall slightly short... i bruise my self until i get it right
this pestillence of excellence has overwhelmed my mind to the point where...
i am chronically sick... i strive to survive within it...
the results? Fatigue, disapointment, high expectations of resiprocation of the same effort i exert.
Disappointment... then finally.. excellence.
"Its for the gods one once said"
But there is but one Almighty...
and thats not me.. healing... thats a start..



The East.. its there the sun's rays show up first
aswell.. its there they leave first.
i sought the light..
the light thats eternally within..
a light that brings peace like a waters in a bayou
butterflies wispering to each other as they float about leasurely
thinking of nothing else but... nothing.
worry free.. no expectations, no pressure,
free of worry, no responsibility but one, which is, to make me wonder how i can also float,
worry free.



The worst.. i've lived that and you have no idea..
no body can imagine what that looks like that i've seen..
the Worst.. we don't talk about.. the east is where the hope is.
the revelation. the dreams. the hope.

Honour

Kiz